Oftentimes, negative self talk or the negative things we tell ourselves everyday cause us to be anxious even about the smallest things. Anxiety is a part of human life. In fact most psychologists say that a moderate amount of anxiety is healthy, because this is the way the mind warns us of dangers or impending threats to our bodies. It is when anxieties start ruling our lives and preventing us from enjoying our existence that it is considered a disorder.

There are many ways to deal with anxiety, but the one that most doctors and therapists recommend is cognitive behavior therapy. This is a form of treatment where a person goes through a series of sessions aimed to change the way he thinks. A good deal of time during these sessions is spent on changing the thought patterns of a patient that takes him from the anticipatory (expecting the worst to happen) stage to the rational stage. This is done by repeating positive words that can drastically alter his thoughts.

Here are some examples of positive self talk that you can try if you are suffering from daily, irrational anxieties:

1. Today, I am in control. I will enjoy this day because everything will work out right today.

2. I am feeling great. Anxiety is something I can control, not something that can control me.

3. Right now I am aware that there is fear inside me, but I am slowly seeing it disappear and I will be fine.

4. For now, I will focus on doing something positive rather than be gripped and paralyzed by this fear.

5. I am getting to be a better person because I can control my negative thoughts.

6. I will take a deep breath and as I release the air from my body, so will the toxic thoughts in my mind be removed.

7. Anxiety is a bad habit that my body has learned through time. It is not too late to change this habit and channel the energy I spend being anxious into something more positive.

You’ve often heard it said - “You are what you think you are”. There are many instances when the thing you fear most becomes real - this is because sometimes the thoughts that you have in your head become a self-fulfilling prophecy. And so if you think that you will attract disaster, you certainly will!

Do not let anxious thoughts fill your life with fear and misery. Take charge of your life by filling your thoughts

It tends to be easier to take things for granted when they’re a constant part of our lives. How true this can be with spouses, friends, and family. As unfortunate as this is, it does happen. One activity that we all have shared since birth is breathing. Most of us have never given it any consideration.

If you observe a healthy newborn breathe, as they inhale the lower abdomen extends to fill the majority of the lungs from the bottom to the top. It is a deeper and longer breath. This is normal, healthy breathing.

However, very few of us adults breathe this way. As the matter of fact, most of us breathe with a shallow breath drawing air in only to the mid to upper lungs and only filling approximately one-fifth of their capacity.

Forget about what you just read and go to a large mirror. With your eyes starring directly at your shoulders, take a very deep breath. Did your shoulders move upward quickly? If you are like most of my clients, they did.

This type of breath is what is called a stressed breath. Have you ever noticed when you’ve been surprised by something how you’ll take a quick shallow upper lung breath and hold it? This is relaying information to the brain that you are stressed or anxious and begins the stress response in the body. The endocrine system - adrenals, thyroid, pancreas, pituitary, hypothalamus - is stepping up production of hormones to meet a perceived energy need. The fight or flight reflex is in full gear.

Normally, as the situation passes, the breathing should return to deep, calm abdominal breaths, and the stress response in the endocrine system deactivates.

However, this is not what I am seeing clinically. Because of chronic stress, anxiety ensues, and the breath pattern is reset to a more shallow and less effective state that constantly tells the body that it is in a stressed state. This breaks the body down prematurely, weakens the endocrine system, and leads to hormonal dysfunction.

This newly established breath pattern decreases the amount of oxygen in the body that can lead to anything from sleep problems and fatigue to immune system dysfunction and disease.

This shallow breath also makes it easier for us to suppress and repress feelings we don’t want to feel back into the subconscious. This will then create havoc on hormones, the body, our health, and our relationships.

If your breath pattern demonstrates this stressed pattern, don’t get discouraged, it can be retrained. Sit down in a firm chair at the same time each day for about 10 minutes. Place one hand palm side on your belly button and on each inhale, begin by expanding your lower lungs first by pushing out your hand. Your shoulders should barely move even with full inhalation. Breath out and contract your abdomen as your hand moves in.

Do this daily for as long as it takes to re-establish the proper, normal breathing pattern. It took me about three months to do this, so please be patient. You may begin to notice changes in your attitude, comfort, and overall health. Hang in there, you’re worth it.